alex on November 26 2012
My apartment is either freezing cold or molten lava hot... Why must I live inside a hot pocket? For those international listeners not familiar with Hot Pockets they are an American snack which comes frozen and consists of a bread pocket(wouldn't be American without bread) and stuffed with processed meats from exotic animal regions such as pig throat and anus then as a final touch a processed cheese made from chemicals is mixed in there. Really they're quite tasty but cooking them is an art only the most determined can accomplish. Your first hot pocket will go something like this - Cook for instructed time - remove Hot Pocket from microwave - take a bite into the well-cooked, tasty, flaky exterior only to find you've hit a wall of thick Antarctic glacier on the interior. You tell yourself obviously it hasn't cooked long enough, maybe 30 seconds more? Yes good - letâ€™s try this again. Everything looks good, the cheese and meat interior is melted and no longer resembling a prehistoric wooly mammoth trapped in ice. You go in for the bite "mmMMM-LORD HAVE MERCY MY MOUTH IS IN FLAMES." You then have first degree burns in your mouth and can't taste anything for a week. And the funny thing is... it's all worth it.